For most, divorce can be an immediate option when marital problems occur. Many give very little opportunities for change to come, as they endure processes for growth and development of the relationship. However, on the other hand too many endure the abuse; verbal, physical, sexual, and emotional longer than they should. Every incident that occurs is an indicator of internal pain that is being taken out on the other person whom they claim to love. Think about it! How can someone love you when they haven’t learned how to love themselves? Any abuser should abuse them self first. Instead of them working out their pain on you, you should be working your way out of the pain. If you stay in any abusive relationship for too long, the love and commitment you have inside becomes self-inflicted. The continued abuse, constantly and consistently, diminishes your self-worth. The man or woman that is being abused ends up loving their mate more than themselves. This mentality is formulated as a result of the continued degrading thoughts, which come out in words and actions. However, the compassion and love within your soul (mind and emotions) can cause you to drawer closer to them, because in your heart you know that the person who claims to love you is emotionally ill. Emotional cancer can spread to the life of the other person’s emotions, and alter the thinking to the degree that they will stay in a situation longer than they should. Can you run immediately? Some do and some don’t! Some circumstances warrant you to devise a plan, exit strategy that empowers you to work your way out! Just because a person leaves immediately doesn’t mean they have left the person. They may have left the premises and environment, but the residue lies dormant repressed by the cares and pleasure of this world. That’s why one can’t tell another what they should do. It is up to the one that is being abused to reach deep within the core of their soul and declare, “Enough is Enough!” At this point, the process becomes more intense because whether you realize it or not you are working your way out! Divorce starts way before you go before the Judge. If you are man or the woman acting as the abuser, you better realize the following:
1) The first time you called him or her out of their birth name in a demeaning way they were working their way out!
2) The first time you cheated on your mate, please believe that they’re working their way out!
3) The first time you hit the one you claim to love they’re working they way out!
The final outcome of the divorce was an indicator that he or she had gotten totally fed up! Divorce is a process. It begins in the arena of the soul where the emotions have been bruised and the questionable thoughts begin to permeate the mind, yet it continues to seep down to the core. To stop the divorce process is to stop acting a damn fool! Be the woman of power or real awesome man that you have been created to be.
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